A walking and talking puppy. 10/21/2013

Kaiya: Mom, if a bad guy broke into our house and he was allergic to squeaks Evelyn and I would make him sneeze a lot.

Viola: Dad, I'm not a puppy!  I'm just Buddy. See I'm not a puppy because I'm can talk and walk.
Viola: Dad, now I'm a talking puppy.  Call me talking puppy, Buddy.

Kaiya (about the bug in her room): I have it surrounded with toilet paper, but it won't last for long. It's a tricky little fella!

Viola: Sssshhhh, be quiet or else the boys will hear you and kill you. So just be quiet okay.? (She was only imagining that homicidal boys were at our house.)

Morgan (while doing homework) But! (laughs) Like this butt! (shakes her butt at me)

Viola: Look at this book! (it's a Barbie cook book) This book is about dirty diapers. It has a lot of dirty diapers in it.

Evalyn: Mommy, I love ya!  I just need you.

Tom: This guy is in the hospital dying with pneumonia.
Mysti: I'm so sorry about your coworker.
Tom: He might pull through poor guy. It's a bummer.
Mysti: Did you really just say that?  "It's a bummer."
Tom: You love me.  I help you with your study of the male social dynamics.
Mysti: You are my study of many things.
Tom: Day number 382, Tom is starting to suspect that he is being studied.

Mysti: Why does my mail have my name as "Mysh Hood" so often. "Mysh" really?

Mysti: Tom, pro tip, never turn your back on Viola for more than a minute.
Tom: That is a good tip.

Twin fun 10/16/2013

Mysti: Evey, I love you.  Could you be any cuter?
Evalyn: Uh huh. (then she starts prancing around the room and squeaking.)


Viola: It's time for the snuggles!

Obey me, I'm your queen! 10/13/2013

Morgan: Get back hear you. Fruit Loops, obey me, I'm your queen!

Morgan: Mom, I don't want muffins can I have peanut butter and jelly instead? Can I have cereal, anything else?
Mysti: Sure we can do that.  You don't have to eat muffins.  They are too delicious anyway.
Morgan: But I want muffins.  Why can't I have them?
Mysti (to Tom): Chicks man!

Moms are for cuddling. 10/12/2013

Evalyn: (farts while snuggling Mysti) Mom, I just farted at ya! (giggles)

Viola: Daddy, you can't snuggle me!  You are for rough housing.  Only mom is for cuddles.

How to deal with sad babies. 10/11/2013

Evalyn: Mom, these babies are sad. Aww, the little babies. Now I need to tie them up.

Kaiya: Happy! Happy!
Morgan: What does that even mean?
Kaiya: It means that I'm happy!

Viola: (runs up to Mysti in nothing but underwear) Mom, I need to go cook!
Mysti: I think daddy just finished watching a show about people doing that...
(Tom had just finished watching Breaking Bad a week earlier.)

Fist bumps and sparkles! 10/9/2013

Viola: I was hitting the door with my bones.
Mysti: You did?  Did you hit it with your fist?
Viola: Yeah!  Like this.  (She holds up her two fists for a fist bump)


Mysti: What's the family rule?
Morgan: Not in the face or pelvis.
Mysti: That's right.

Vilola: Mom, those socks are so fluffy and cozy.  (she sits on my foot) Ahh, this is so nice.  I love the fluffy socks.

Tom: My zombie repellent shirt has sparkles all over it!

Evalyn: Mommy, you can't go any ware.  You can't go because I love ya.

Don't be weak. 10/7/13

Kaiya: Remember when I went on the big ride at six flags and the workers almost gave me another ride because I used my cuteness?  My puppy face always works on people who are weak to cute things.

So Old Fashioned. 10/5/2013

Kaiya: What's a dictionary?  Why don't they just look it up online?  A dictionary sounds so old fashioned.

Evalyn: Mommy, look at me I'm sliding like a penguin.  Quack, quack, quack!  Look I'm jumping like a penguin too!

Evalyn: Daddy, I'm a queen.  Do you want to come in my castle and you can be a  ... guy?

Tom: Alright girls quick anatomy lesson.  This area is what we call a pelvis.  It is a pelvis but the pelvis is actually this whole area.  (gestures to his entire pelvis area) This area in between the legs is called a crotch.
Kaiya: What?! That's a silly name.  It should be called the pelvis.
Tom: I know. We say pelvis because it sounds better than Crotch. Crotch just sounds so ... ugh. Pelvis just rolls off the tongue better.
(Whispers to Mysti) That sounded dirty.
Morgan: Pelvis really does sound better than crotch.

Viola: I'm the queen of the queen castle. Morgan you aren't the queen!  You are just a neckey butt!

The thing called a soul, the Dude and a slap in the face.

I was walking into the family room to read with Kaiya when I heard this behind me.

Kaiya whispering to no one that I could see: I have this thing called a soul, now shut your pie holes...




We had some friends over for a play date.  The mom is a single lady who had her daughter who is six on her own.  She has been divorced for about ten years.

Aliah, the friend: My mom was married.
Morgan, to the mom: What?! You found a dude?!
Cheryl, the mom: No no dudes for me.  They take too much work and time.




Evalyn was singing to me and drumming on a pillow.

Evey: La la lala la. La la lala la. La la lala la! La la lala la, to slap in the face..
She took the pillow and back handed me in the face with it as she sweetly sang "slap in the face".



Viola: I'm not a princess!
Mysti: That's fine, you don't have to be a princess.
Viola: I will never be a princess!
Mysti: OK then, that's fine.
Viola: No! Because I will be a Batman!

I am a Velveteen Rabbit.

In many ways my life is full of magic and love.  I was given the gift of both last March.  My little Kaiya gave me both and for the first time in my life I became real.  She didn't even know that she did something magic and it made it even more special.

The day started out normal with one small change of my daughter waking up with a fever and having to stay home form school.  Like I do most mornings I turned on a show for my little girls to watch while I exercised on my elliptical.  After about a half hour she came in to talk to me and said that I was looking beautiful. (I wasn't looking beautiful at all.  I had been working out.  I was sweaty and was in worn out yoga pants and a sports bra. My hair was in a messy bun.  I had been having a hard time feeling good about myself at all for quite a while.)  I was stunned and stopped moving. Then she came over to me and gave me a hug.  Told me that I would always be beautiful because I am pretty on both the in side and outside and that the inside pretty is the most important kind of pretty.

I gave her a hug and told her that she was special and that I was so glad to have her in my life.  Then she went back to watch her movie and rest.  She didn't know that she had made me feel truly special and loved for the first time.  She didn't know that she had done magic.  Some day I will tell her about this when she is old enough to understand it.  Until then I will keep it in my heart and be glad every day that I am luck enough to know such an amazing person.